nokiabae:

my biggest fear is I’m married & my husband says, “let’s cut sugar out of our diet” so I have to leave with the kids in the middle of the night

fuckyeahhayleywilliams:

fastest way to unwrap a mummy in a music video: 9,75 seconds

IT’S HAPPENING!!!!!

vapor-man:

me: damn dude check out this blog

friend: that’s your own dude

me: yeah i know, sick right?

epistemologicalfallacy:

give em the ol razzle dazzle

apricockjam:

”’I’m really not a cat person”’

but their feeT LOOK LIKE BEANS

THEIR. FEET. LOOK. LIKE. BEANS.

childservices:

*reads bad horoscope* *throws rock at stars* fuck u fake bitch

verticulars:

If you can’t deal with my sarcasm. I can’t deal with being your friend.